Anonymous asked: Erm This sounds really disgusting and it is but when i was little after eating/sometimes in between meals id go toilet and poo,like id force myself to poo to get the food out and now i can just poo on demand and thats since i was a little girl and idk if thats bad? Like i still do it now and i restrict also and ern idk if i have a problem?:/

Food has to be digested before it becomes (ahem) poo, so off-hand, I wouldn’t think you aren’t getting nutrients.  But this is something I’ve never heard of, and if it concerns you, I would speak to a doctor.  I do, however, know a lot about restricting…and that IS a problem.  Our bodies trust that we will be feeding it appropriately and regularly, when we begin to do otherwise, our bodies stop trusting, and therefore begin functioning differently.  Metabolism can slow, cravings can be intensified, food becomes the end all and be all of our thoughts…etc.  It’s not worth it.  I know that all too well.  ♥

Anonymous asked: Your site is amazing and I love it. It's powerful and the pictures are so inspiring!

Thanks for the love!  I’m so happy to have created an inspiring, safe place.  Hugs to you!  You’re welcome anytime.  ♥

Anonymous asked: I don't have an eating disorder, but I do struggle with depression, anxiety, and occasional cutting. Sometimes I restrict/purge a bit (~600 calories/day), to punish myself and because I wish I were emaciated and visibly suffering. But I've never stuck with it for more than a few weeks or lost more than 5 lbs. I know I'm lucky not to have an ED, but I can't help thinking that I'm not "good enough" to have one, and it's just another example of not being able to control myself. How stupid is that?

Eating Disorders don’t always look like what we see on tv or read about online.  And darling, you may very well have one.  ED-NOS is the most common and most deadly eating disorder because it is often mistakenly seen as “not serious”.  People do not seek treatment for fear of not being sick enough.  But the thing is, having that thought is a symptom of being that sick.

You’re not stupid for thinking this way.  Your thinking in skewed by a very real problem that needs addressing.  No amount of restricting and purging is ok for your body or your spirit.  Please find a therapist.  It is evident to me that you have extreme self-hatred.  And you don’t have to live this way.  ♥

Anonymous asked: Do you have any tips on how to accept all sizes? I'm recovering from anorexia and doing really good, eating-wise. But I have noticed that I have this habit of staring at people that are a bit on the heavier side. During my worst ED phase I had an obsession with my thighs, scared to death that whatever I ate made them expand like 2 inches. I often find myself looking at other's thighs, with a mixed emotion of fear and disgust. I feel so horrible and guilty, but I don't know what to do about it?

Body comparisons is a sneaky little thing.  It can happen quite subconsciously.  I’m glad you are aware of it, because it’s such a big issue!  Comparing never does anyone any good.  If you find yourself on the low end of the comparison, you beat yourself up for that.  If you find yourself on the high end, you beat someone else up.  EIther way, it is self-hate manifesting itself in different ways.

When you’re changing a habit like this, it take awareness (which you’ve got), followed by action.  This action is literally talking back to your automatic thinking.  Respond to it.  Think what you would want to think when you look at others, or at yourself.  It doesn’t matter how silly or fake it sounds.  Forcing yourself to think against the grain will actually create new neuro-connections in your brain.  It takes time, but eventually, healthier, more loving thoughts will become the norm.

I’m happy for you and your progress.  Keep it up!  ♥